We are celebrating King’s day. Actually: my humans are celebrating it, like all the other humans in Holland. They eat and drink orange stuff, there are Dutch flags everywhere and music and people selling things they don’t need anymore. It is kind of a party. For them, that is. I do not care much about it. I mean: I don’t mind if they are having fun, but they don’t have to include me. I especially do not like this dressing-up-part of this national party. But alas, there is nothing I can do about it. Not today.
This is a silly time. The days are dark, the smell of food is in the air more than in any time of the year and humans stuff their houses with sticks adorned with odd looking, light emitting things. Normally we dogs are not allowed to take sticks into the house, but now humans do this themselves! Very odd.
Yesterday I met a dog who told me he had had a good time with these special sticks, when he was home alone. He had a lot of fun with the trinkets and the tasty tree, before his humans got home and got very mad. We discussed that this is strange: how can you put something to play with in your house and not want your dog to play with it? That is just not fair. Besides, he told me the house looked much more cosy and festive with the trinkets (and the tree dissembled into manageable sticks) scattered through the living room. So his humans should be thankful, instead of angry!
We do not have these sticks in the house, but our neighbors do. Yesterday I heard their cat singing (well, yammering actually) through the walls: ‘oh christmas tree, oh christmas tree, your ornaments are history’. Then I heard a crash. I didn’t know cats play with sticks, too!
It is all right with me when humans behave odd. But they should leave us dogs out of it. The trouble is: they don’t. They appear to think we need some special attention too and with attention they do not mean things dogs like (like taking a long walk or gnawing a juicy bone), but things humans like. One thing is… they dress us, in stupid clothes! Throughout the year only chihuahuas have to stand being dressed up like little humans, but during winter times other dogs are victims, too.
I will tell you why it is NOT a good idea to dress your dog. We are not human, we have fur. That keeps us warm enough. We do not like clothing, it gives us a stuffy feeling and it itches. But, most important: dressing up your dog is killing for her image. If she will go out in that reindeer sweater you bought for her, the dogs in the neighborhood will never take her serious again. I know what I am talking about. When I was a puppy and living with my foster parents (before M and P adopted me), I was dressed up, too. It was minus ten degrees Celsius and I did not have enough hair to keep me warm in those days, coming out of Greece and all that. This is what it looked like:
Yes, it looked utterly ridiculous. I could do nothing about it at the time: I did show my teeth, but being so small they thought it looked ‘cute’ and dressed me up all the same. I am only sharing this with you to show how stupid clothes look on a dog. I did not care much about image building in those days, just arriving from Greece and looking for a home I had other worries. But now I live in a new place, with a proper home, I would never wear something like this. It would be killing for my image with the cool dogs in the neighborhood.
So if this Christmas (that is what these silly days are called) your human gives you clothes for a present, make him/her very clear you do not appreciate it. Tear them apart immediately. Pee on them. Give them to the cat. I for myself am sure M would never give me clothes. I am hoping to get hair extensions, for my ears!