Category Archives: Food

No sea snacks today

We went to the beach, hurray! It was storming the last few days, so we only walked in the forest. But today the weather was fair, so we walked through the forest and the dunes to the beach. It smelled promising when we got there: I smelled lots of salty juicy sea food. There were a lot of birds too, eating things. That is always a good sign. I usually chase them away and check out what’s available for snacking.

This time I was disappointed, though. There were no little crabs at all, just this. Loads of them:

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I don’t know what they are, but they are not good for eating. They smell tricky. There was a labrador eating them, but you should never trust a lab when it comes to eating. They eat everything, including non edible stuff. I met a lab once who told me he had eaten six raw eggs, including their carton box. Of course, afterwards he concluded this was a bad idea, it was kind of hard to digest. He also was abandoned from the bedroom that night, because he farted all night long. Ha! Lab’s are okay, they are harmless and always willing to play. But why are they so empty-headed?

 

Pizza

I love my humans. They made a pizza, especially for me! I had to behave before I got it, so I did. Obviously. I’m a dog, I know when it is profitable to behave.

My pizza 1

I did some research before I ate it.

My pizza 2

Then I enjoyed the delicious taste. I savoured salt, oil, dough and smoked ham. Nice, an Italian pizza!

My pizza 3

Of course I made sure there was no single crumb left.

My pizza 4

The pizza did not have my favorite topping, but well, it’s a start. My humans are finally getting what I like best!

Food & style

I am a dog, so I must admit I am not very picky when it comes to food. I eat almost everything. I am choosy when it comes to other things, though. Like the leashes and collars I wear – I love it when they have matching colors (yes we dogs do see color, not fifty shades of grey). I think one has to be stylish, always.

That is why I am so pleased with the new thing M has for storing my food. They feed me raw meat, which comes in an icy cold pack in the form of a sausage. This is were she keeps it in:

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It is a storage thing especially made for bubbles. Which means: me!!! Awesome.

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My favorite pizza

I have given it a lot of thought and I have come to a conclusion: I know what my favorite pizza is. I thought especially about this topic during meditation.  I know I should let go of all my thoughts while meditating, but that is very hard with musings about pizza. So I decided I’d think it through once and for all and after I made up my mind about my favorite topping, I could stop thinking about it during meditation. And be ready to ’empty my mind’, whatever that is.

I am ready to reveal it now: my favorite pizza is a quattro stagioni. That means it consists of four toppings. One topping is a big fat juicy pigeon (dead, so it won’t fly away). The other one is fruit de mer, especially little crabs and some herring. The third topping is another real delicacy: cat poo (preferably fresh, but a few days old is no problem). The fourth piece of my favorite pizza is an even more craved for delicacy, very hard to find (which puzzles me, because there should be loads of it, considering the number of people): human poo.

Favorite pizza

When I told M about my favorite pizza topping, she made a face that probably means she will not make this one for me. She did tell me that I am presumably right in choosing these toppings, from a canine point of view. And that I could make some money if I would sell this pizza to all the dogs I know. Ha! She must be joking. Selling pizza, what a silly idea. I would never do that, I would eat them all!

 

Sea snacks

Hurray, the little crabs are back! There were a lot of them on the beach, yesterday. I saw some other dogs happily chewing and I ran to the shore to make sure they left enough for me. I am glad to say the crabs were abundant. I had to be quick, though, because the water came in:

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Besides the crabs there was other sea food, too: all kinds of shells and little stars. But they don’t taste as well as crabs, so I leave them to the seagulls. Once I met a dog who ate a whole jellyfish and got very sick because of it. Eat a jellyfish!!! He was not a very bright dog, that one.

 

 

Cargobike special

Look what we found on our walk this week:

Cargobike herring

It is an old fashioned cargobike that is used to transport herring! You know, the absolutely delicious delicacy the Dutch eat – and so do I? This cargobike was parked outside a fish shop (I couldn’t believe we just walked by and M did not buy fish for me, but we did. What a shame).

I think the flowery things are not on the bike when they use it for transporting fish, because that would make no sense. I do know what would be good to transport with the fish: me! I am a ferocious guarding dog, I am especially good at guarding food.  So they can hire me, next time they do a transport! That would be nice. And sensible. They don’t even have to pay me much, just some fish would be fine.

 

Favorites

Humans like to make lists, I notice as I am browsing the internet. They name their five favorite travel destinations, or the ten things you should do if you want to date a pretty girl. Some of these lists are very awkward. The one about dating, for instance. The most important thing is not in the list: give her yummy food! Humans can really miss the point, sometimes.

There are a lot of lists about food, too. I think this is a great idea, so I have been thinking about my favorite  things to eat. Here it is:

1 – Pigeon

This is my number one, although I must admit I never really tasted a pigeon. I did manage to catch one, lately, but I ended up with a lot of feathers in my mouth and no juicy meat, because the pigeon escaped. So maybe this is not a good number one for this list of favorite things. Maybe I should make a list of favorites I wish for, another time.

 

1 – Pizza

This is something I actually eat a lot and it is awesome. I haven’t figured out yet which topping I like best: cheese or meat or both. Maybe pizza with pigeon is the ultimate yummy food, but I can’t tell you now (see above). I know I should make a picture of a pizza to show you here, but in reality I am not good at making pictures of food. When I see food, I eat it. So the pictures of it all look the same:

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This was a pizza with mozzarella and bacon, by the way. Delicious!

2 – Duck

Duck tastes really good, especially the ducks in France. The meat is juicy, with a good bite and wonderful taste. I hope we will visit France again, soon!

3 – Little crabs

I love little crabs. When I am lucky, I find them on the beach near our house. I search for them, they usually hide between the shells and seaweed on the shore. But I always find them, of course. I like them best when they are really fresh, just out of the water. Sometimes they try to run from me, but that is stupid. I am the fastest on the beach, so resistance is futile! One time I tried a larger crab, but that did not taste as well as the little ones. A bit too crunchy, in my opinion.

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Strange day

There is something weird going on. M and P are usually good to me, but today they give me presents, out of the blue! This is what I just got:

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Strange looking thing, but it is for eating. Which I did, after playing with it first, of course:

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So now the strange looking thing is gone, but the strangeness of the day remains. Because it was not the first tasty thing I got today – I must have done something really good, although I can’t remember what. Well, it is nice to have me around, of course. I don’t have to do something in particular to deserve a reward, right? That must be it. M and P are just extremely happy they are with me.

Silly

Fred caught a duck! He just told me. He was walking along a canal and suddenly saw some fat ducks sitting beside the water. Fred can be very quick and he was on them before they knew it. He caught one duck by the leg and happily brought it to his human.

Then something strange happened. His human got really angry and told him to drop it. Fred did, bewildered by this reaction and presuming his human wanted it for himself. That is why he brought it in the first place. But his human told Fred he was a bad dog and let the duck get away!

Fred and I are really puzzled by this behavior. Because after the incident with the duck, his human went to a shop and bought meat. I mean: why would you do that? Rudely deny a tasty duck that is delivered to you by your loving dog and then go and buy meat because you want to eat it for dinner? Humans can be very, very silly.

 

Duck

It is not so bad, having a holiday in France. There is a lot of nice food here we don’t have in Holland. They even make bubbles where we are now! I like it when people I don’t know personally produce something good and name it after me. Even though I am not allowed to drink it yet, since I am under-age (I am almost two). This is a picture of the bubbles they make here:

bubbles

And here is a picture of something I am allowed to eat. It is delicious, fat and juicy and very tasteful. Duck! I have to get M to know how to make this, then I will catch her a duck and she can prepare it for me. So I can eat this every day. Yum.

Confit de canard